I miss you so much Ken, The weeks I spent with you at the hospice I found so difficult to cope with, when you were upset or in pain, knowing I couldn't do much about either. I could only be there with you & do my best to support you. I was so pleased you wanted us to be with you, after the first week you wanted me there all of the time. I would have done anything to help you, your step dad felt the same too. It was nice to see he meant so much to you & you to him.

Not one day did you complain about your pain or say why me. Yet I spent many hour when you were sleeping thinking why's this happening to you. A few times you woke and caught me wiping away tears from my face, you would say sorry kiss my cheek and give me a big hug. I treasure those hugs and you holding my hand.

I think of the times at Christmas or birthdays when you and Mark were little, you used to help him open his presents. You used to take good care of him. Has you both got older you both used to have the odd fight, all brothers or sisters fight or argue with each other from time to time. I know you both loved each other and you both love your younger brother Craig and he loves both of you.

When you were in hospital and the hospice, you all showed how much you meant to each other. You all hugged each other and cried. Both Mark and Craig wish like we all do that you were still here with us with no pain or cancer.

When you left us it was the hardest thing so far I have had to face. I could not have coped with out Richy. I wish with all my heart that Shanny, her family & your sons had just understood why you wanted to be with your grandmas, grandad, brother, aunts, uncles & cousin instead of being as you put it in the letter you left, by yourself in Leeds.

                                                              _   

5/5/16 We find it hard to to keep up with cutting the grass & weeding round your grave, I promise we will keep it tidy as long as we are able to. I have asked Shanny, Chris & Josh to help. Shanny did pay half with us for the surround. since then we have put gravel & grass down. I have asked if they could help us to keep it tidy, it is so hard to do it by our selves, its 2019 & still having no help! Only our Craig & Steve helped at the beginning.

7/5/17 Asked again for help in tidying maybe your brother Mark will help. Craig's helped a few times.

23/7/17 We put a card with a message on the Memory tree at the Wheatfields Hospice when it's your birthday & every Christmas. We put flowers at your resting place today. We thought you may have had a visitors, sadly still no visitors only us. 

23/7/18 Put flowers on again today as we do often. No visitors only us.

2019 Josh came with Charlotte, Josh had asked if we could take him to visit your resting place, we took them over. When we got there Shanny had been & had put flowers on, thought it strange, why Josh didn't go with is mum that morning. 

2019 We always put flowers & things on your resting place at Christmas as well as through out the year.